Twitter has now suspended TWO of my accounts: RealScottBato and TheScottBato. Both were obvious parodies, duh. TheScottBato's bio said "I am not Scott Baio."
These accounts were started after filth-mouthed, woman-hating conservative Scott Baio (@TheScottBaio) tweeted that his wife called Obama a "shitfuck," and he agreed. Many American patriots pointed out to him that perhaps calling the president a "shitfuck" was not the best way to generate positive attention for his children's charity. He blocked everyone who spoke up, and continued to giggle about stupid liberals. (In one tweet, later deleted, he called them "retarded.")
Then Baio got his big career break. He was given a segment on The Glenn Beck Show. The problem was, Scott Baio is not a smart man. That same day, he clicked a phishing email, and managed to lock himself out of his Twitter account.
While blaming "liberal hackers" for compromising his account, he started a replacement, @RealScottBaio. And to prove it was him, he held up a sign with his name on it! Which he misspelled "Bato" because he's truly, genuinely dumb.
So, since my name is Scott Bato, I started @RealScottBato because I was tired of the lies around my name. Baio has a cadre of overweight, stupid female fans all hoping to be his next Joanie, so they descended on @RealScottBato like there was a 2% off sale on Nutter Butters at their Wal-Mart.
After a few days of obvious, over-the-top parody, Baio figured out who was behind the account:
Michael Thibodeau AKA @dayswithdave is responsible 4 the FAKE @realscottbaTo acct. Support & @caroline knows. PLZ RT
Scott let loose his army of flabby-forearmed dummies. Of course, he was wrong - the person they accused had no idea who @RealScottBato even was. After clucking around for a while and complaining to someone named @caroline, the @RealScottBato account was suspended. Baio announced that my account was "only directed to hurt children." Says the person who can't even refrain from calling Obama a "shitfuck" while talking about his charity.
Since my voice was being silenced by a D-List, foul-mouthed celeb and his army of fans, I migrated to @TheScottBato. Which has "I am not Scott Baio" right in the bio. This account was disabled last night - evidently Twitter is not to be used for mocking Scott Baio.
So I need to ask a favor of everyone. We need parody Scott Baio accounts by the dozen. Please take five minutes to help:
1. Create a fake Scott Baio account. Go to gmail, get any old address (not your regular email), and then go to Twitter, come up with a good not-Baio name and open the account.
2. Send a couple of tweets, with the #baio-shitfuck tag. You can direct them to @RealScottBaio if you like.
I'll collect the good ones and post them here.